What Marriage and Family Counselors Can and Cannot Do

You’ve made the decision to seek assistance for your marriage and family. Good work! This is a wise choice. You are prepared to acknowledge that you need assistance after bumbling along for only you know how long, and this is a significant start in the right direction. So you enter a counselling room full of hope and anticipation.

At this point, it’s critical to know what to realistically anticipate from your marriage and family therapist; otherwise, you risk setting yourself up for major let downs. Let’s first take a closer look at what marriage counselling is before illuminating what to anticipate from it or what takes place during it.

What is Marriage Counseling?

Couples can learn to strengthen their marriage through greater communication and conflict resolution through marital counselling.

Marriage and family counselling are often undertaken under the direction of a licenced therapist for a brief length of time until the relationship crisis is resolved.

Every marriage eventually encounters challenges and conflicts that put the union to the test, and no matter how much you love one another, you are unable to work through them.

Just wishing for the problems to go away at this point in your relationship might not be sufficient. Your relationship deteriorates over time as a result of these problems and disagreements.

When you need an objective viewpoint to assess your relationship and guide you towards amicably resolving your issues, then is precisely the time to seek marriage counselling.

A therapist can lead you along a path to a more meaningful relationship through various marriage counselling exercises and approaches.

However, a lot of people either have a hazy understanding of how marriage counselling works or how beneficial it is, which may be quite detrimental.

Marriage and family therapists can assist you in a variety of ways, but there are also some things they are unable to do.

Knowing what to anticipate from your counsellor is crucial; otherwise, you run the risk of setting yourself up for disappointment. Marriage and family therapists can and cannot assist you in a wide range of ways.

Let’s examine some of the activities that a marriage and family therapist can and cannot perform in more detail:

The can’s

  • A couples therapist can offer suggestions for what might be the problem in your marriage and can also direct you to specialists who can assist you in resolving these issues.
  • A marriage and family therapist can offer you a judgment-free, secure setting where you can discuss your worries and problems in detail.
  • They could provide a stage on which couples may speak without one of them dominating the other.
  • You can get excellent assistance from a marital and family therapist in coping with the emotions and sentiments that may come up during the sessions.
  • You can learn good communication skills and how to be receptive to your spouse’s wants and feelings from a marriage and family therapist.
  • Marriage counselling advice from a marriage and family therapist teaches you how to treat your spouse with respect and consideration.
  • Teach you how to handle situations in the marriage such as infidelity, abuse, money, misunderstandings between cultures, sexual incompatibility or other sexual issues, rage, and certain physical or mental illnesses.
  • A marriage and family counsellor can also assist you in deepening your love for your spouse and improving your mutual understanding.

The cannot’s

  • If you’re not ready to address issues head-on, the marriage counsellor cannot read your thoughts or figure out what is going on.
  • They cannot repair your marriage for you, but they can assist you in realising what you might need to do.
  • You must be prepared to make the effort of doing some soul-searching and being brutally honest with your loved ones about your faults. They cannot do the hard work for you.
  • Your difficult spouse cannot be “sorted out” and transformed into a better husband or wife; rather, each party must be willing to handle their own problems in their own lives before blaming the other.
  • Your partner cannot be coerced into taking part against their will.

Marriage and family ties can occasionally resemble long-distance marathon running.

Without your crew of “seconds” or aides, who come alongside you at key stages to give you water and vitamin drinks, sponge you off, and cheer you on, you cannot finish the marathon.

This is the marriage and family counselor’s job: to support and uplift you, provide you with helpful advice, and provide you with the essential nutrition you require at that particular time, whether it be emotional, physical, psychological, or spiritual.

However, you still have a race to win, and it is up to you to finish the marathon of developing wholesome bonds with your spouse and children.