The Value of Conflict In Relationships

Any relationship will eventually experience conflict when you and your spouse will damage each other, if there is one thing you can count on.

It is to be hoped that these relationship conflicts won’t arise too frequently. But sooner or later, one of you will say something hurtful, fail to comply with a request, or otherwise cause angst.

Relationship conflicts are typically brought on by unfavorable interactions, emotional upheaval, and a difference in perspective or personality.

Aside from the potential grief, there are a number of significant reasons why conflict is necessary or even beneficial for a partnership.

Relationship conflict can bring out the worst in us, but it can also reveal something about our true selves. Relationship conflict can reveal how well you understand your partner.

Additionally, when there is disagreement in a relationship, we have the chance to see how effective we are at addressing it.

Therefore, despite the fact that no one enjoys having a fight, it is important to recognize the worth and significance of conflict in relationships.

Here are a few explanations on why disagreements in relationships can be quite important.

1. What do you do in that situation?

Sulk, retaliate, or adopt a passive-aggressive stance? And if it’s any of these, do you feel that it advances the discourse and creates a space for the issue to be worked out, or does your reaction only help to exacerbate or downplay the harm?

Keep yourself out of your shell. A healthy conflict is one that gives you both a chance to let out your emotional tension.

If you don’t express your anger, it will simply grow inside of you and eventually fester into resentment, making it even harder to resolve the problem.

2. Was your partner intentionally cruel to you?

To begin with, ask yourself if your partner truly intended to hurt you. An unintended slight and a calculated attempt to annoy you are very different things.

Think for a second about what motivated the assault or omission before responding. Premeditated attacks are uncommon in partnerships that are healthy.

Determining how to handle conflict in a relationship is crucial. Make sure you don’t use the argument as a pretext to physically abuse your partner in an effort to make up for previous wrongdoings.

3. You have the chance to strengthen your bond.

However, just because harm wasn’t intended doesn’t imply that harm hasn’t already been done.

The good news is that these slights, injuries, disappointments, and mistakes also present possibilities for personal growth and, when handled delicately, can strengthen your bond with your spouse and increase mutual understanding.

Consider a couple that spends their entire relationship avoiding each other’s triggers, sore spots, or past injuries as a comparison.

With only a thin layer of pleasantness to keep it going and a mound of unresolved issues underneath, how inert and lifeless would such a relationship be?

You should evaluate the causes of disagreement with yourself as well as your partner. Think about your feelings and consider how you might be able to settle the difficulty they are causing.

4. Strong relationships can tackle differences

Therefore, if you never quarreled or offended each other, you would spend the rest of your life trying to avoid setting the other off.

That would not only be a prescription for a relationship that would never work, but it would also provide you no opportunities to find out anything about your partner’s vulnerable points so that you could approach them in a direct and empathetic manner.

And by revealing those vulnerable areas, you all have the chance to better comprehend and process things on your own.

Let’s look at how to handle conflict in relationships constructively after explaining why disputes are required for good partnerships.

How to handle conflict in a relationship

You must learn how to handle conflicts in relationships if you want them to have a beneficial effect on your union.

1. Be sincere and forthright

Couples find it challenging to communicate openly about their feelings and expectations of their spouse, whether the relationship is fresh or long-standing.

They frequently use oblique gestures, attitudes, and even routines to convey their discontent and need for their partner’s attention.

There are a variety of explanations for this behavior, and they vary from partner to couple.

One spouse may be reluctant to communicate their emotions and feelings for fear of being dominated if the situation leads to an argument.

They may be assessing how well their partners know them by putting them to the test.

They may attempt to sidestep the problem by changing the subject since they are too stubborn to recognize that they made a mistake.

Even though these arguments are absurd, using such deceptive tactics to handle a dispute just makes it more difficult to find a solution. Therefore, it is imperative that you stay focused on the current problems, regardless of the conflict.

2. Active listening

In many ways, the idea of attentive listening has developed into a clique. It is one of those characteristics or traits that is necessary and significant in practically every area of a person’s life.

Nevertheless, despite how frequently this phrase is used, you must understand that it has always been crucial when attempting to settle a dispute in interpersonal relationships.

Use a timer and give each partner five minutes to make their peace in order to avoid interruptions and avoid misunderstandings.

They wouldn’t be disturbed during those five minutes, and the second person would listen and take notes.

After the allotted five minutes, the following person would clarify any points they were unclear about and ask questions to gather more information.

This aids in preventing any misunderstandings that would have otherwise happened. For the following five minutes, the other partner will have the opportunity to speak.