How Being in a Marriage Affects Your Relationships With Friends

Let’s discuss some of the typical worries and disputes that may arise when we tie the knot. Rest assured, it won’t be a gloomy bore! Not only will you hopefully gain more knowledge, but you should also feel more confident about your relationship and its stability afterward.

The “wrong kind of friends” problem

You might have observed that after marriage, you spend less time with your single friends than you once did. That’s very reasonable and acceptable! Though it wouldn’t be entirely accurate to say that they’re jealous, you no longer share their single status, which was something you had in common with them. since of this, it may be challenging for you to relate to one another since, although their tales of disastrous dinner dates are diverse, yours will almost certainly feature your spouse.

Additionally, it can be unpleasant for your single pals to spend out with you and your partner since they may feel like the third wheel or, worse, that you’ve achieved something that they haven’t yet achieved—finding love. If you spend out with your single friends or girlfriends without them, your husband might believe that you’re attempting to run away from your new life, which could be problematic.

How then do you handle this? Do you just allow those friendships to fade away? Although it happens, it’s not actually necessary for it to. You need to figure out a way to stay in touch with them without making your marriage a point of controversy if you want to avoid the third wheel problem or the insecure spouse problem.

I tried to host guests more often when I was married. I’ve thrown dinner parties, board game evenings, and movie outings for groups over the years. As a faith-based family, my spouse and I have been more involved in our local church – something we didn’t want to do when we were younger, but now we find it to be surprisingly beneficial for expanding our social circle and keeping us engaged in our community in novel and enjoyable ways.

The issue of contradictory religious beliefs

A friend of mine recently tied the knot. Her fiancé had been up Protestant, whereas she had been raised Catholic. Even with how long ago that dispute occurred, tension between the two families can still arise as a result of it. How would they observe Christmas? or Easter? or any services in general? Though there was no animosity, my friend and her spouse might have a problem.

This was never a problem because of communication and compromise. With their families, they took a seat and spoke about what they ought to do. My friend’s parents seemed to prefer their Christmas services over their Easter ones, and her husband’s parents felt the same way. After some time, they decided to attend my friend’s church for Christmas and her husband’s church for Easter.

As that first year went on, my friend and her husband were even able to persuade their parents to occasionally attend services at each other’s churches. This demonstrates that when thinking about how a new marriage affects current ties with your individual families, communication is actually the most crucial thing to maintain onto.

Finding new friends

Long-term partners will attest to the fact that it gets more difficult for the two of you to make acquaintances. As previously indicated, you can definitely keep up your old friendships, but sometimes it isn’t feasible. However, as humans are social beings, we all require a social life. The dilemma is, how do you make new acquaintances when it becomes more difficult as you get older?

Can you recall why it was simpler for you to make friends in high school or college? It was more than simply a coincidence that you met folks with whom you clicked. It was probably because your classes were together and you felt compelled to be together. For this reason, you and your partner ought to think about enrolling in a course—ideally one that will teach you both a new skill.

I recently saw another friend of mine get married, and he and his wife encountered the same issue. Despite being somewhat encouraging, their single friends gradually lost much of an affinity for them. They could hang out with other couples, but those couples had their own plans and things to take care of. Eventually, the stresses of loneliness started to get to my friend and his wife, but they were unsure of how to establish friends.

Observing this, I recommended that they enroll in a class together. It didn’t really matter what kind of class they took, but if it was something they could learn with a group of others who shared their ability level, that would foster a sense of camaraderie that would facilitate the formation of friendships. They discussed painting, ballroom dancing, and improving, but in the end, they settled on ceramics. Despite their lack of ceramic expertise, they thought it would be enjoyable.

As it turned out, they had become friends with a few of their classmates over the six-week course. With these new pals, they now host their own get-togethers where they eat supper, sip wine, and spend a few hours molding clay.

It’s never too late.

These are some of the typical problems that recently weds deal with. But like many other problems a new family may encounter, these are all easily resolved. Marriage does have an impact on your friendships and familial ties, but it’s not always doomed to fail, particularly if you know how to adapt to the changes.