7 Ways to Keep from Losing Yourself in Your Relationship

How can I avoid being a victim of this relationship? Now that I’m married, who am I? Once they enter a committed relationship or get married, many women battle in secret with these issues. Can you relate to this? You are searching for your identity, for who you were before you entered into a relationship or got married, for answers, and for that part of yourself that you feel has been lost or that you believe has passed away.

Is this you?

You were extroverted, enjoyed going to the movies, traveling, spending time with friends and family, relaxing at the spa, reading, volunteering, supporting your service organizations, and many other things. You also knew your likes and dislikes, were the self-care queen, and had a distinct identity. What transpired between her and you? Where did you go, when did you cease breathing, and when did you decide to renounce who you were in favor of the romance or union? When did you stop being who you truly are, when did you stop being authentic, and when did you stop participating in your own life?

Many women experience this in their daily lives.

Women who cease living after they get married or into a committed relationship experience this. These women come to this realization while searching for themselves after having lost themselves in a committed relationship.

A “Disappearing Woman” is a woman who tends to sacrifice her individuality, her beliefs, her career, her friends, and occasionally her sanity whenever she is in a romantic relationship, according to Beverly Engel, psychotherapist and author of Loving Him Without Losing You.

Have you vanished?

Have you stopped living life and have little to no time for your family, friends, or yourself? Have you lost touch with who you are, what you like or detest, and the activities that bring you joy and fulfillment?

You don’t have to give up your passions, interests, goals, or dreams because you’re in a relationship or married. Just because you’re in a relationship doesn’t mean you should stop enjoying life, feel or act as if life has ended, or give up things that make you happy and bring you joy. As you lose yourself more and more, you will eventually grow to hate the person you have become and regret not having lived life.

The simplest thing to do in a relationship is to lose yourself in it.

It’s possible to avoid this, though, and I urge you to think about the following things in order to do so:

Recognize who you are.

Have your own distinct identity and avoid letting the relationship define who you are. Also, avoid being so preoccupied with the connection that you lose sight of yourself. You contribute your individuality to the relationship and make it what it is; the relationship does not define who you are.

Participate in activities you enjoy –

Don’t let being in a relationship prevent you from engaging in the activities you enjoy. You should have interests and hobbies outside of the relationship because doing so will prevent you from depending on your partner to meet all of your needs.

Find ways to give back to the community –

Support and participate in your chosen cause by volunteering. Giving back to the community will satisfy your need for a sense of community, improve your self-esteem, and offer you a sense of fulfillment in life.

Stay connected with friends and family –

Remember to take care of your family and friends even while you are in a relationship. Spend time with them, maintain those connections, and be there for them whenever you can. Don’t forget about the people who supported you before the relationship. Having friends outside of a relationship is healthy.

Practice self-care –

Plan some time for yourself, whether it’s a girls’ weekend, a spa day, or just some alone time to contemplate, refuel, and rejuvenate. This time can be spent with your friends or just by yourself. Self-care is crucial.

Keep being who you are.

Don’t compromise, give up, or disregard your principles; rather, be true to them. You lose yourself when you compromise your morals and beliefs in a partnership. Never stop being who you are and never stop participating in your own life.

Speak up –

Recognize that you have a voice and that your ideas, beliefs, emotions, and worries are important. When you know you disagree with thoughts or statements, don’t say nothing. Be yourself, take a stand for what you believe in, and speak up.