5 Misconceptions Of Marriage

1. You’ll lead a happy, long life

Despite how cliche it may sound, a lot of people still think that happily ever after is a fairy tale. A lot of folks think that getting to the altar is the difficult part. The real job starts after the vows are exchanged, even though walking down the aisle may be challenging. Many married couples have said to me, “Anyone can get married, but can they stay married?” The true challenge is to stay married. It’s not a given that two individuals who choose to get married would want to stay together forever. Every day, the two must decide whether to quarrel or stay together for the next day. Even while some days are harder than others, it’s still a struggle. So, don’t stress over thinking ahead of time. Simply focus on each day as it comes.

2. Your partner will make you complete.

It makes sense that people would believe such statements to be true when they are seen as romantic, like “you complete me.” Many people think their partner can make up for any shortcomings they may have. I’m sorry to break the awful news to you, but nobody can make you whole. Many folks I have witnessed feel the same emptiness in their marriage that they experienced when they were single, and they are baffled as to why. You have to learn how to finish yourself. Nothing is worse than finding the love of your life and then being unable to really appreciate it because you haven’t resolved your personal problems. Isn’t it right that the person you love should see the complete you, not just a glimpse of it?

3. After they are married, they’ll change.

It’s amazing how many people think that saying “I do” at the altar causes a switch to flip and that people change as a result. Unexpectedly, saying “I do” won’t make a person completely different. Yes, there are certain things that people are prepared to give up because they are married, like talking to your spouse when making decisions. That unpleasant quality in your future spouse that you don’t like won’t go away with marriage.

Just because you got married doesn’t mean that your partner’s desire for kids will go away. Marrying your spouse won’t make them want to stop sleeping around right away if they do. Getting married won’t make someone who spends money irresponsibly want to become a financial expert. In other words, don’t expect someone to transform just because they got married to you. Ascertain whether you are prepared to spend the rest of your life with this somebody exactly as they are.

4. Less sex will take place

The expected decline in sex that has harmed marriages for years has been feared by many couples. In actuality, the amount of sex you will have during your marriage is up to you two as a pair. Again, your sex urge cannot be turned off by flipping a switch at the altar. Yes, certain things—like having kids, having demanding work schedules, or just becoming older—may come up in your lives and prevent you from having sex. However, in order to keep other things from getting in the way of your sex, you two need to prioritize it. Prioritize your sex life in the same manner that you would prioritize communication and quality time.

5. Love is enough

I would be wealthy if I had a $1 for each couple that believed that a strong marriage could be maintained solely by love. Love, as lovely as it sounds, is insufficient. To be honest, there will be moments when you experience very little affection. Love is a fleeting emotion. It’s an emotion. Do you always feel joyful? Or how about furious? No. Love functions in a similar manner. You may not always feel “in love.” What will keep you together is your respect for each other, your vows, and your marriage. That’s what will help you get through the days without love till it comes back.

I hope these dispel some of the numerous myths people have about marriage, even if there are still plenty. Happy Valentine’s Day!